Nkhani Zofunikira 5 M'mabanja Akuluakulu Akuluakulu Ovuta

Nthawi yomwe ndakhala ndikugwira ntchito ndi achikulire omwe ali ndi maubwenzi ovuta ndi abale awo yanditsimikizira kuti othandizira ayenera kudziwa zovuta zazikulu zisanu.

1. Ubale wapachibale ndi ubale wautali.

Ubale wa abale, wopatsidwa nthawi yonse ya moyo, umakhala nthawi yayitali kuposa ubale wina uliwonse womwe munthu angakhale nawo - wautali kuposa ubale ndi makolo, othandizana nawo, ana, ndipo mwina, abwenzi. Chifukwa chake, kulongosola kapena kuthetsa ubale wapachibale ndikofunikira kwambiri kuti munthu akhale ndi moyo wathanzi chifukwa mgwirizano pakati pa abale nthawi zambiri umafunika posamalira makolo okalamba, komanso posamalirana.

2. Othandizira nthawi zambiri samaphunzitsidwa kuganizira za maubwenzi a abale ndi alongo achikulire, ndipo samawafunsa za chithandizo.

Monga Michael Woolley ndi ine tidalemba mu magazini yaposachedwa kwambiri yamagazini Ntchito Zachitukuko , achikulire omwe ali ndi vuto logwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo amathanso kukhudza, ndikukhudzidwa ndi, maubwenzi ovuta ndi abale awo. Pokhapokha ngati azachipatala aganizira za ubalewu, mwayi wothandizira njira zamabanja (zomwe zimaphatikizapo abale ndi alongo) adzasowa. Achibale ayenera kuphatikizidwa pojambula mapu a wamkulu kapena genogram.

3. Izi nthawi zambiri zimakhala zosokoneza maubale.

Pomwe magawo awiri mwa atatu mwa anthu 262 omwe adafunsidwa za buku lathu, Ubale Wa Abale Akulu , afotokozereni ena kapena abale awo onse 700 mwachikondi, ena amafotokozedwa mosiyanasiyana. M'malo mwake, zolembedwazo zimafotokoza zakusamvana komwe kumakhalapo m'mabanja ambiri a abale achikulire. (Onani ntchito yabwino ya Victoria Bedford.) Inde, pali zovuta zambiri pagulu loti mukhale bwino ndi abale anu, koma tropeyo amanyalanyaza zenizeni zakukwera ndi zovuta zomwe abale ndi alongo amakhala nazo nthawi yonseyi.

4. Ubale wapachibale ndiwosokonekera komanso wosokoneza.

Abale awo nthawi zambiri amawona kuti samamvetsetsa machitidwe a m'bale wawo. Komanso, samva kuti m'bale wawo amawamvetsetsa. "Amanditenga ngati kuti ndinali ndi zaka 16 ndipo sindikumvetsa munthu amene ndakhala," ndimaganizo wamba. Kusokonezeka chifukwa cha machitidwe a m'bale wanu kapena kumverera kuti sanamvetsedwe kumatha kubweretsa kusamvana.

5. Malingaliro amathandizo am'banja atha kuthandiza kuthana ndi mavuto am'bale.

Ntchito ya Murray Bowen imatilimbikitsa kuti tiziwona ubale wapakati pa abale ndi alongo. M'malo mwake, tidapeza kuti ngati bambo amadziwika kuti ali pafupi ndi abale ake, ana ake amakhala ochezeka kwambiri. (Zindikirani, abambo, ndipo yesetsani kulumikizana ndi abale anu!) Chitsanzo china chosonyeza kuphunzira kuchokera kwa akulu akulu chimakhudza mayi yemwe adasiya kulumikizana ndi mchimwene wake atachoka kunyumba kwawo. Zaka zingapo pambuyo pake, awiri mwa ana a mayiyo adakumana osagwirizana. Mopanda pake, adaphunzira kuti awa ndi machitidwe ovomerezeka kuchokera kwa amayi awo.

Structural Family Therapy (SFT) imalimbikitsa othandizira kuti azisamalira malire a abale awo. Kodi makolo amagawika mu ubale wa ana akuluakulu? Kodi makolo akulowerera m'malo obadwira komanso osalola abale awo kuthana ndi mavuto awo? Kodi abale ndi alongo akumenyera makolo okalamba? Ngati ndi choncho, makolo atha kulepheretsedwa kulowererapo ndipo abale akhoza kulimbikitsidwa kuti azigwirira ntchito limodzi. Pamene kholo lidwala kapena kufa, izi zimakhala zofunika kwambiri.

Pobweretsa abale awo mchipinda chamankhwala, othandizira amatha kuthandiza makasitomala kuthana ndi zovuta zina zomwe zingawasokoneze moyo wawo wonse.