Chifukwa Chake Kulanga Si Mdani Wakhama

Zamkati

• Mfundo zazikuluzikulu

Mfundo zazikuluzikulu

• Ambiri a ife timawona zochitika za tsiku ndi tsiku ndi kapangidwe kake ngati zotsutsana ndi kukhala moyo wokonda komanso wachangu.
• Chikhulupiriro chotere ndichinyengo chabodza chomwe chimasokoneza kulandila kwathu monga kiyi wa moyo wachisangalalo.
• Kaya timakonda kapena ayi, kuti tichite bwino pachilichonse, tiyenera kuchita zinthu mobwerezabwereza ndipo nthawi zambiri zimakhala zosasangalatsa.
• Titha kuchitapo kanthu kuti tisinthe malangizowo kukhala gawo lofunikira pakumanga moyo wokonda, komanso watanthauzo womwe tikuyembekezera.

Chimodzi mwazinthu zodabwitsa kwambiri zomwe ndidamvapo chinali mu kanema wa 1989 "Lean on Me." Morgan Freeman anali kujambula malemu Joe Clark, wakale wa Principal of Eastside High School ku Paterson, New Jersey. Pokamba nkhani yolimbikitsa aphunzitsi kuti aphunzitse bwino ophunzira, adakuwa, "Kulanga si mdani wachangu." Idamveka mwamphamvu chifukwa ndimadziwa kuti ndizowona - komabe zinali zosiyana ndi momwe ndimakhalira mpaka nthawi imeneyo m'moyo wanga.

Kwa ambiri a ife, mawu oti "ndandanda" kapena "kapangidwe" mwachilengedwe amapangitsa lingaliro lakukhala ndi "chizolowezi." Timachita zinthu zomwezo mobwerezabwereza popanda kusintha pang'ono kapena ayi. Tsiku lililonse tinkadzuka nthawi yomweyo, kudya nthawi yomweyo, kugwira ntchito maola ofanana, kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi nthawi yomweyo, ndipo mwina kupumula pang'ono tsiku lililonse. Tinalonjezedwa kuti ngati tingathe kutsatira chizolowezi, tidzakhala ndi moyo wathanzi, wathanzi, komanso wopindulitsa. Chilichonse chokhudza njirayi chimatanthauza kudziletsa, kumalire ndi kunyong'onyeka. Timavomereza kutsatira chizolowezi pang'onopang'ono, chokhazikika, komanso chosasinthasintha kuti tikhale ndi moyo wovomerezeka komanso "wachikulire".

Koma timaganiza kuti pali malonda. Kuti tikufunika kusiya chidwi chathu. Tiyenera "kukula" osalakalakanso zochitika zosangalatsa komanso zoopsa m'miyoyo yathu. Sitilakalanso kukhala katswiri wothamanga, wothamanga, kapena wochita bwino. Apita masiku a maphwando ovuta, malingaliro osangalatsa koma owopsa amabizinesi, komanso mayendedwe opanda pake. Chiyembekezo chathu chokhala moyo wamtchire chiyenera kufufuzidwa pakhomo.

Zachidziwikire, tiloledwa kumwa pang'ono pena apa ndi apo, mwina sabata yabwino ya gofu, kapena kupita maulendo abwino ndi mnzathu ndi banja lathu. Pazonse, tinafunika kuti tidzakhale akuluakulu ndikuzindikira kuti zosangalatsa zili kumbuyo kwathu. Tikufuna kulangizidwa, chizolowezi, komanso dongosolo tsopano.M'malo mwake, chibadwa chilichonse chopita kunja kwa bokosi ndikutsatira zomwe timakonda chimanyalanyazidwa ngati kukhala wachinyamata kwamuyaya komanso wosakhwima-zomwe zimawopseza mayendedwe ndi kapangidwe kamene timafunikira kuti tikhale athanzi ndi achimwemwe.

Chifukwa chiyani?

Chifukwa chimodzi ndikuti mwina ndizowona. Kaya timakonda kapena ayi, kuti tichite bwino pachilichonse, tiyenera kuchita zinthu mobwerezabwereza ndipo nthawi zambiri zimakhala zosasangalatsa. Mukufuna kukhala ndi ntchito yolipira? Ife kulibwino tizikhala tikugwira ntchito tsiku ndi tsiku. Mukufuna moyo wathanzi? Tiyenera kugona nthawi zonse, kudya mopatsa thanzi, kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi, komanso kupewa zinthu zoipa tsiku ndi tsiku. Mukuyembekeza kukhala ndi ubale wabwino ndi banja? Ingolani anzanu ena ofunikira adziwe kuti simumakakamizidwa kukhala nawo pafupipafupi ndipo muwona momwe zingakhalire. Ngati tikufuna kuchita bwino, timafunikira chizolowezi komanso chilango.

Chifukwa china chomwe timaganiza kuti chilango ndi mdani wachangu ndichakuti mawu athu oyamba pakulangiza monga machitidwe ndi ndandanda adatikakamiza. Sitinafunsidwe konse zomwe timafuna — tinangouzidwa zoyenera kuchita. Panalibe zogulira ndipo panalibe kuchitira mwina. Tinkayenera kupita kusukulu sabata iliyonse. Tinayenera kugona nthawi yogona ndi kudzuka m'mawa kwambiri kusukulu. Tinkayenera kudya chakudya chathu nthawi zoikika.

Kuphatikiza apo, ngati sitinachite izi, panali zotsatirapo zoyipa. Titha kumangidwa kapena kuyimitsidwa kusukulu, atakhazikika kapena osaloledwa kuchita zina mwazinthu zomwe timakonda. Kapenanso nthawi zina, enafe tinamenyedwa kapena kuchitiridwa nkhanza. Ndipo ngati izi zikutanthauza kuti sitinasangalale kwambiri - zikhale choncho. Mverani choyamba, funsani mafunso pambuyo pake — ngati zingatero — inali njira yabwino kwambiri yopezera zinthu ndipo pamapeto pake mudzakula ndikukhala ndi moyo wachikulire wogwira ntchito.

Koma vuto ndi lingaliro ili ndikuti tapanga dichotomy yabodza. Sikuti chilango si mdani wachangu, koma ndiye njira yokhayo yokulitsira ndikulimbikitsa chidwi m'miyoyo yathu. Ndilangizo ndendende monga momwe zimawonedwera mchizolowezi, kapangidwe kake, ndi dongosolo lomwe limatipangitsa kuti tipambane kupambana kwakukulu.

Zachidziwikire, titha kupita pasiteji kangapo ngati tili ndi talente yaiwisi. Koma sitidzakhala akatswiri odziwika bwino, othamanga, kapena ochita zisudzo popanda kupirira zaka zambiri akuchita. Ndipo ngati cholinga chathu ndikukwaniritsa luso lathu, tiyenera kuvomereza kuti zingatenge maola masauzande angapo kuti tigwire pang'onopang'ono.

Ndakhala ndikuganiza zambiri za nkhaniyi kuyambira pomwe ndalankhula ndi a Marc Labelle a gulu loimba la rock lotulutsa Los Angeles la A Hardcore Humanism Podcast . Tikaganiza zamagulu olimba amiyala, timakonda kuganiza za achinyamata omwe amatenga nawo mbali mwamphamvu, osadukiza, okalamba omwe amakhala ndi mwayi wokhala ndi mbiri yolembedwa kuti awatulutse mumdima ndi apange nyenyezi. Koma Labelle - yemwe amakhala kunja kwa galimoto yake pafupifupi chaka chimodzi, kenako pamakhonde a anthu ena - nthawi yomweyo adakhazikitsa njira zomwe zimaphatikizapo zolimbitsa thupi, kugwira ntchito, kupitiriza kuyimba gulu lake, ndikusewera ziwonetsero kuti akwaniritse maloto ake a rock star .

Ndiye timagwiritsa ntchito bwanji chilango polimbikitsa m'malo mothetsa chidwi chathu?

Choyamba, tiyenera kukana mwatsatanetsatane malingaliro abodza oti chilango ndi mdani wachangu. M'malo mwake, tiyenera kuvomereza lingaliro loti chilichonse chomwe tingafune kuchita chomwe chingayambitse chidwi chathu ndichachidziwikire chimakhazikika pakulanga, chizolowezi, komanso ndandanda. Potero, timakaniranso malingaliro akuti "wamkulu" ndi "wokhwima" moyo ndi komwe tiyenera kusiya chidwi ndi chidwi. Ndiwo uthenga wabodza womwe pamapeto pake umasokoneza kulandila kwathu ngati kiyi wa moyo wachisangalalo.

Chachiwiri, tiyenera kudziwa cholinga cha moyo wathu. Nchiyani chimatisangalatsa? Nchiyani chimatidzaza ife ndi chilakolako? Nchiyani chimatipangitsa ife kudzimva olumikizana ndi ena? Pokhazikitsa malingaliro athu pa moyo womwe tikufuna, timakana kwathunthu lingaliro loti wina akulamulira. Chifukwa chake, malangizowo tsopano atha kumvedwa potengera masomphenya a moyo wathu-osati wina. Chifukwa chake, tili nawo monga gawo lathunthu - chida chothandizira.

Kenako, tikubwerera m'mbuyo, titha kudzifunsa kuti, "Kodi tiyenera kuchita chiyani kuti tikwaniritse cholinga chathu?" Kodi chingatithandize ndi chiyani tsiku ndi tsiku, sabata iliyonse, mwezi uliwonse, pachaka kuti tikhale ndi moyo wachangu, wokonda, komanso wolumikizana? Kenako titha kukhazikitsa ndandanda ndi magawo owonjezera omwe angatitsogolere kumapeto kwa zolinga zathu. Ndipo tikamayenda m'masiku athu, titha kuwunikanso pafupipafupi kuti tiwonetsetse kuti zochita zathu ndizabwino kwambiri kuti tikhale ndi moyo wokangalika, wokonda kuchita zinthu, komanso wopangika ndi cholinga. Izi ndizomwe zimachitika posachedwa, chifukwa zomwe zimayambitsa chidwi zimatha kusintha komanso zomwe tingachite kuti tikwaniritse zolinga zathu zingasinthe.

Pomaliza, tiyenera kuzindikira kuti pamene tikukhala moyo wololera, sitingakhale achangu nthawi zonse. Nthawi zambiri timawona kuti zomwe tikubwerezabwereza ndizotopetsa. Ndipo ndi. Chidwi chomanga chimakhala chopera. Koma ndi kugaya komwe kumapangitsa kuti zinthu zichitike. Tiyenera kudzikumbutsa nthawi zonse kuti ntchito zazing'ono komanso zovuta izi ndi zomwe zimatifikitsa pafupi ndi zolinga zathu. Ndipo ngati titsatira zomwe timachita ndikuvomereza kuti pamapeto pake chilango sichili mdani wachangu, titha kukhala ndi moyo wokonda, komanso watanthauzo womwe tikuyembekezera.