Chifukwa Chomwe Nthawi Zina Kunena "Ayi" kwa Ana Anu Ndikofunikira Kwambiri

Makolo omwe amawopa kupondaponda nthawi zambiri amakhala ndi ana omwe amaponda zala zawo. —Mwambi wachi China

Khulupirirani kapena ayi, makolo amasamalira ana awo kwambiri ngati sawapatsa mwayi wouzidwa "ayi."

Kwa makolo ambiri, nthawi zonse amanyengerera kuti avomereze zofuna za ana awo-makamaka ngati angathe kukwaniritsa zofuna zawozo, koma nthawi zambiri ngakhale atakhala kuti sangakwanitse. Mwachibadwa makolo amafuna kuti ana awo azikhala achimwemwe. Komabe, chisangalalo chomwe chimaperekedwa ndi zinthu zakuthupi sichichedwa kutha, ndipo kafukufuku akuwonetsa kuti pali mbali yakukweza yomwe ikufunika kukhala ndi "chinthu" chotsatira chatsopano, kaya ndichoseweretsa chofunikira pakadali pano kapena mtundu waposachedwa kwambiri wa foni yam'manja. Imalimbikitsa kudzimva komwe kumatha kukhazikika kwakanthawi. [1]

Ana anu akhoza kukhala othokoza kwambiri akamalandira chinthu chatsopano "chowotcha", koma pafupipafupi chomwe chimazimiririka chakuda pakangotentha kumene kwatsopano kudzatsika kumsika. Pakadali pano, m'malingaliro a ana otere, zomwe ali nazo zimawoneka kuti zatha ntchito komanso zosakhutiritsa. Ndipo, ngati mungalolere kuti mupatse ana anu kutentha kwatsopano kumeneku, pomwe iteration yotsatira ipezeka, mphamvuyo imabwerezedwa. Uwu umakhala gulu lozungulira lomwe limabweretsa chisangalalo komanso kusakhutira.

Zina mwa maphunziro ofunikira kwambiri omwe mungaphunzitse ana anu ndikuti chimwemwe chenicheni sichipezeka pakupeza zomwe mukufuna; chakhazikika pakuyamikira ndikugwiritsa ntchito bwino zomwe muli nazo.

Kuphunzira momwe mungathanirane ndi kusapeza zomwe mukufuna komanso nthawi yomwe mukufuna ndi luso lofunikira lomwe aliyense akuyenera kukulitsa. Pali zifukwa zingapo zomwe makolo ambiri safuna kukhazikitsa ndikukhazikitsa malire ndi ana awo:

• Safuna kuyang'aniridwa ndi mkwiyo / kukwiya kwa ana awo
• Akuilipira zolakwa zokhudzana ndi zokumana nazo zakale ndi ana awo
• Ali ndi chikhumbo chosayenera chocheza ndi ana awo
• Amakhulupirira kuti ana awo ayenera kukhala ndi zonse zomwe akufuna
• Amafuna kuti ana awo azikhala ndi zambiri kuposa momwe amachitira ali ana okha
• Safuna kuti ana awo azisowa zinthu momwe angachitire

Kodi zilizonse mwa izi zikukukhudzani?

Ngakhale makolo omwe, pazifukwa zilizonse, amachita chilichonse chotheka kuti asakane ana awo, padzafika nthawi yomwe angafune ndipo ayenera kukhazikitsa malire. Uwu ukhala mtundu watsopano wa gehena kwa onse okhudzidwa. Ana anu akazoloŵera kumwa mopitirira muyeso, osapeza chilichonse chomwe angafune amamva ngati kuwamana.

Kukana ayi ndi njira yokhazikitsira malire. Mwachilengedwe, ana anu amayesa malire omwe mumayika ndikukuyesani kuti mutsimikizire ngati malirewo alidi enieni kapena ayi. Amatha kupempha, kuchonderera, kulira, kulira, kupsa mtima, kukwiya kwambiri, kapena zonsezi. Mwa zina izi zimawonetsa kukhumudwa kwawo posapeza zomwe akufuna, koma amafunanso kuti awone ngati angakupatseni mwayi.

Mukalola, mumatumiza uthenga kwa ana anu kuti "ayi" sizitanthauza ayi, ndikuti ngati atapempha, kuchonderera, kulira, kapena kulira, apeza zomwe akufuna. Kupereka kumalimbikitsanso machitidwe okakamiza ana anu, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti zibwererenso komanso kuti zikhale zovuta kuzimitsa.

Kuterera kwa kutsetsereka kumeneku sikungakokomezedwe. Mukakhala olimba ndikutsatira malire omwe mumakhazikitsa mosasintha, ana anu amaphunzira pang'onopang'ono kutsatira malamulowo mosavuta komanso mwachangu. Kumbali inayi, ngati mumakhala olimba poyamba koma kenako mumasiya chifukwa ana anu amakulemetsani ndikupatsani mwayi wopitiliza kupempha, kuchonderera, kulira, kapena kulira, makamaka zomwe mwawaphunzitsa ndikuti ngati pemphani, chondererani, fuulani, kapena kulira Kutalika kokwanira , pamapeto pake adzapeza zomwe akufuna.

Ndizothandiza kudziwa kuti mukanena kuti ayi, sipayenera kukhala sewero lalikulu. Kukhala wowongoka komanso wosasunthika mukamayesa nthabwala zosapepuka kumatha kupanga njirayi kukhala yopweteka. Ine ndi amayi a ana anga aakazi tinkakonda kugwiritsa ntchito mawu ngati "Pezani zenizeni, Neil," "Ayi, Jose," "Palibe mwayi, Lance," ndi "Nope, sizikuchitika." Tidabwereza mayankho awa moyenera ngati kufunikira - monga mawu kapena nyimbo yokhazikika - ndipo zidachita bwino kwambiri pothandiza ana athu aakazi kuvomereza kuti, nthawi imeneyo, sadzapeza chilichonse chomwe chinali iwo amafuna.

Ngati pali makolo awiri (kapena kupitilirapo) omwe akukhudzidwa, mwachidziwikire ndikofunikira kuti iwo agwirizane pankhani yakukhazikitsa ndi kukhazikitsa malire. Mikangano pakati pa makolo nthawi zambiri imawapangitsa kuti asokonezane ndipo imatumiza mauthenga osakanikirana ndi osokoneza kwa ana awo. Kuphatikiza apo, ana omwe ali ndi luso lophunzira kusewera kholo limodzi motsutsana ndi mzake amadziwa kuti ndi kholo liti lomwe angapite kuti akwaniritse mwayi wopeza zomwe akufuna. Dera limakhala lovuta kwambiri ngati makolo sanakhale pamodzi, koma zimapindulitsa ana awo kuti makolo ayesetse kuyimba nyimbo yomweyo mpaka momwe angathere.

Ana amafunikira dongosolo ndi malire, ndipo makolo amafunika kukhala olimba mtima komanso olimba mtima kuti azitha kuyika pachiwopsezo ndikuthana ndi ziwopsezo za kukhumudwitsidwa, chisoni, mkwiyo, ndi mitundu ina ya mkwiyo. Uwu ndi mawonekedwe a kulolerana pamavuto ndipo zingakhale zovuta kwa makolo ambiri.

Sindikudziwa kholo lililonse lomwe limakondwera pomwe ana awakwiyira, koma ngati mumangopereka zofuna za ana anu, kuchita chilichonse chomwe angafune ndikuwapezera chilichonse chomwe angafune, zimapereka chiyembekezo chosatheka momwe ntchito padziko lapansi. Amaphunzira kuwona dziko lapansi kuti likhala kuti lizitha kukwaniritsa zosowa zawo, ndikupangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kuti athe kuchita bwino mtsogolo, mosasamala kanthu za zosowazo.

Ana amafunika kukhala ndi chidziwitso chophunzirira momwe angachedwetse kukhutira ndikuthana ndi malire omwe amawaletsa. Kulimba mtima kumene ana anu amakula chifukwa cha zochitika ngati izi kumatenga moyo wawo wonse, pomwe mkwiyo ndi mkwiyo womwe amakupatsani ndi wakanthawi.

Copyright 2018 Dan Mager, MSW